1. |
Cyber Monday's Here
01:21
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Stoke up the fire with one more log
Whip up the eggs for one more nog
No time to walk the goddamn dog
'cause midnight's almost here
Fill up the Keurig, check your lists
Empty your bladder of your piss
Don't go to sleep or else you'll miss
The best day of the year
The Monday after Thanksgiving
When every online store
For only 24 hours
Drops prices through the floor
Buy all your crap in just one day
Santa is just one click away
The cheapest and most convenient way
To spread some Christmas cheer
No need to slog down to the mall
No need to wear your pants at all
Come login with Uncles Storm and Paul
'cause Cyber Monday's here
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2. |
Mister Small Business
01:04
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I'm Mister Small Business
The Main Street thousand-aire
Don’t tell me what is on your list
Because frankly, I don’t care
Stocking shelves with the latest goods
Might be good for some
But it’s not my kind of fun
And when all business is small business
I’ll be number one!
(He's Mister Small Business)
No price can be too high
And I’ll mark ‘em up right in front of your face
Because I’m that kinda guy
Soon the world will come to me
With nowhere left to run
The days of Cyber-Mon are done
And when all business is small business
I’ll be number one!
OR MY NAME ISN’T SMALLWORTH J. BUSINESSINGTON!
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3. |
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Cyber-Mon, we sing to thee
Crappy junk we bring to thee
Out with the dreck of obsolescence
In with the deals for brand new presents
Amen (Come, Cyber-Mon)
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4. |
Ol' Palm Pilot
00:06
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5. |
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Tra-la-la-la, la-la, sha-na-na-na
Hey, hey, yeah!
You and me and him and her
Are gonna make it if we really try
Ridin’ along on a rainbow train
To a lollipop stop way up in the sky
Why do some people drown in a barrel of frowns?
Don’t ask me, ‘cuz I don’t know why
But you and me and him and her
We got lovin’
And we’re gonna fly
You and me and him and her
Have got a recipe for good-time pie
One part hugs and a mile of smiles
And a little laser magic from my secret supply
Preheat at 350 for at least half an hour
And bake for 45 minutes or until it’s golden brown
Yeah! You and me and him and her
We got lovin'
And we’re gonna fly
Tra-la-la-la, la-la, sha-na-na-na
Hey, hey, yeah!
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